Even though you may have become single quickly, perhaps through a divorce, finding and becoming part of a new relationship will not happen so immediately. I was gainfully employed, had all my teeth and (grey) hair. What I realized is that I didn’t get any responses because I was aiming at the wrong target.
I was too busy scribbling away in my Ivory Tower to keep in touch with friends and family, much less go out to see them and have a drink or dinner or even coffee with them.
They would invite me out, I would choose art over friendship, and I would turn them down.
I’ll give you 5 to 10 years younger, but don’t go beyond that. In your journey to visibility, I need you to get out of the damn house.
Beyond that, and you’re venturing into creepy territory. — When you are doing things that make you happy, you are going to want to hang out with people who are also doing those things. Once I started really embracing my nerdiness, I wanted to hang out with other folks who loved the same thing that I did.
Because of this lack of thought, Because I didn’t have a partner to share my life with, I didn’t have any little ninja or princesses raise. I was alone because I was too busy trying to write the Great American Novel.
Great American Novelists rarely have children, and if they do, it’s with a young French nanny that they were having an affair with. When you have no social life you will have a very small to non-existent circle of friends.I walked her out to her car, and asked if she would like to get together again. I would have been embarrassed, ashamed and would have tried to talk her into a second date by promising to be less nerdy. I had discovered a love of anime and watched those crazy Japanese cartoons. Who is the man that you face in the mirror each morning? When you go out, are you relaxed and comfortable in your skin, or are you nervous and desperately trying to do things and say things that will gain her approval and get you a second date? Get out and about, and join the rest of us.— As Wayne Dyer once said, we are not human doings, we are human beings. I learned how to say “No” and tried to say it just as much as I said “Yes”. I rediscovered my love of nature and taking long walks to just decompress. You must strip away the facade and become who you truly are.I bought each Harry Potter book on opening day and read the whole thing in a weekend. Investigate all rules and beliefs that are holding you back. You must roll away the stone of your self-imposed prison and get out here with the rest of us. Welcome._____This article originally appeared on William Mize’s Blog.Imagine my surprise when they did not come immediately. I would log in each morning, right after my workout, and see the empty Inbox and I would die a little inside. What you need to realize is that this is a long term game.Finding the love of your life will take time and it will take patience.Just as Harry Potter was able to pull a cloak of invisibility over himself to hide from his enemies, we feel this cloak begin to cover us and hide us from the world and the dating opportunities that are out there. We occasionally hide our feelings inside a bottle or at the end of a fork. I wasn’t thinking about a long term relationship, or about a relationship in general.