Dating a person 10 years older

When it comes to the subject of love we always hope that there are no real significant barriers to its success.In our hearts, if not in our heads, we’re convinced that love will always trump practical concerns such as money, social class, race and even gender. And what about age as it relates to older women involved with younger men? You’re not going to a get a true picture about someone’s lifestyle in a month; give yourself a few months of dating to make sure that you’ve seen him or her in as many real-life situations as possible.

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There is potential that you could never be financially equal to him, accepting this is key.

You may need to start skipping the traditional Thursday through Sunday bar scene with the girls to appease his lifestyle.

Consider a list of activities that fall on the hedonistic end of the behavioral spectrum: drinking alcohol, gambling, shopping, traveling, and spending, for example.

Are you always up for something fun and spontaneous?

“When you’re with a younger person, you have to think, ‘What’s going to happen in five years? No matter what your age, to go forward in life with an eye toward becoming a kinder, more loving person sounds like an infinitely wiser approach to keeping love alive than worrying over the inevitable appearance of laugh lines.

I’ve heard so many different rules about dating someone older, and they all boil down to a magic number: “Don’t date anyone more than ten years older,” or “Marriages never work if there’s more than fifteen years’ difference.” People love rules, telling themselves that abiding by them will cause them to get hurt less. The most important rule to follow is a general one: Make sure the two of you have the same goals for the relationship and for your daily life together. Think about whether you want to get married; have a big or tiny wedding; have children; be with someone who already has kids; live in the future in the same town or city where you’ve been dating; move somewhere far or close; have extended family very involved or not very involved in your life; have a relationship where you socialize almost always together or often; have a partner who’s more of a social butterfly or homebody; and have a partner who is very involved or not very involved in extracurricular activities. Psychological Age You’ve probably heard someone say, “He seems young for his age,” or “She’s so young at heart.” Though we all have a chronological age, we also have what I refer to as a ‘psychological age.’ How old do you feel, for example? In addition, ask yourself what the psychological age is of your prospective older partner. Again, use those early months of a relationship to gauge whether your sexualities are congruent enough.

If you answer these questions honestly, you’ll have gobs of good information as you try to determine whether a long-term relationship with the older individual could work well.

(It will never be exactly the same for two different people.) Assess Your Proclivity for Indulgences While many behaviors in the extreme form represent a problem or even an addiction, some of those same behaviors can be harmless if not taken to the extreme.

He inevitably has a few years on you – professionally and personally.

You might love his deep pockets, but with his great power comes your vulnerability.

Assess Your Social Circles Take an honest look at your friends and anyone else who is a recurring character in your social life.

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