In fact during my mum’s crockpot phase of 1985 — it was my preferred dinner option. My gorgeous 12 yo niece Elouise starts high school next week and so this week I sat her down to give her some Aunt-to-niece advice about what i wanted her to know. Of course she’s used to hearing me bang on about finidng your tribe (though you can never say it enough!! But I came up with four other points I wanted to really talk through with her … There is not much you can control in your life when you’re a tween or a teen. These are the friends who are loyal and kind and you feel good about yourself when you’re with them.
It wasn’t until I was an adult with kids of my own that it clicked. First rule of Fight Club: What’s discussed in the notebook stays in the notebook. But here’s what I said to her about Instagram (and every other social media platform). You can spend your days creating and doing OR you can spend your days looking down at your phone, obsessing over likes and viewing every moment, every interaction as to how it can best be curated for Instagram. It has a habit of white-anting our lives when we don’t have strong boundaries in place. everything from how most bullying starts to playing team sport to working to be a part of her new school community. But the one thing – and possibly the MOST IMPORTANT thing – which you *can* control is WHO YOU CHOOSE TO HANG AROUND. Any fights or spats you have with them are minor and it’s only good natured teasing that occurs (any really mean teasing is unintentional and true friends will apologise).
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I went to Coles and bought a small round chocolate mud cake, tipped bags of lollies on it, whacked a candle on top and presented it to my son on the night of his sixth birthday. When they think back to their childhoods and the type of mum I was, I want my kids to recall being loved and safe and accepted and a priority and I also want them to remember that sometimes I BOUGHT THE CAKE. Mum is officially giving you permission to lower the bar. The things which I had no idea were – that night – knotting her up inside. So I waited until my mum was in the shower and then quickly knocked on the bathroom door and blurted out, “MUMIWANTTOSHAVEMYLEGS! I remembered the need to speak to my mum about boys or periods or razors without, you know, looking at her. Without having her look at me and see how awkward and embarrassed and clumsy I felt. And I love that for the rest of her life; she’ll have this notebook filled with my handwriting. I said that she’ll have the rules her mum and dad set her about who she can follow or friend and when she can log on. Sometimes you’re a bad fit for the school you’re in. Keep that in mind throughout your life — always prioritise in person catch ups. Understand The Destructive Nature Of Gossip And Work Out Who To Vent To High schools run on gossip. Nearly every teenage girl (and every woman) gossips to some degree but let’s be clear — gossip is the source of pretty much all high school drama and bullying, The more you engage in destructive gossip, the more you get involved in spreading rumours about other students, the more tumultuous your high school days will be. Lives can be destroyed especially when rumour-spreading happens online. And rather than ask them the moment they get home — it’s often later at night when they’re willing and ready to open up. So often it’s not personal and we need to be aware of the ‘story’ we create in our heads about a negative event. Lifeline on 13 11 14 Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800 Mens Line Australia on 1300 789 978 Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467 When I was fifteen if you’d asked me what my life purpose was, I would have mumbled something about marrying Kirk Cameron and working as a children’s TV host.
Despite the fact I’d bought my daughter this mother-daughter journal a year ago for the exact purpose of her being able to write to me about her concerns, I still thought, “I can’t believe she’s using the journal! But there’ll be a whole other set of often unspoken rules that her friends make. Playing netball or basketball or hockey or rugby or soccer. Wiseman makes three things very clear in her book: * How much you gossip (as a parent) directly influences how much your child gossips. This is why you want to work on your resilience and your inner grit and find ways to brush off those moments. Neither happened (I blame the corkscrew perm and stone wash jeans. But still, back then if I had a “purpose” I figured it was to be a reporter on Wombat or Simon Townsend’s Wonder World. These days I feel like my purpose is to help teenage girls traverse that tricky path from childhood to adulthood.
It’s a running dialogue in your family so that when stories hit the news you can talk about the Stanford Rape Case and watch the Consent is Like A Cup of Tea video and discuss what consent MEANS.
You can talk about the boys from Orange Sky Laundry winning Young Australians of the Year and the genius of their mobile laundry idea and how it will change lives .
Dolly Everett was just shy of her 15th birthday when she decided the online bullying she was enduring was too much to handle any longer. I feel gutted for Dolly’s beautiful family – how do you make sense of such a needless loss? And I feel heartbroken for every child who today is dreading the thought of going back to school later this month because school is a living hell, a place where they feel tormented and alone. But let me repeat what I said at the start of my list for teenage girls …
there is no ONE conversation to have with your son about drinking or drugs or sex or consent or respect for women or depression or homophobia. It’s about using every teachable moment that comes your way.
” “Keep your hands to yourself” These can all become part of your daily conversation. Protect your headspace and give priority to those people and organisations who motivate and inspire you.
We need to teach our kids (but especially boys) to read people’s facial expressions and body language. ” And, of course, do lots of reading (including an equal amount of stories with female protagonists) since reading is one of the key strategies to help build empathy. Here are some great men for teenage boys to follow on social media: Nic and Lucas are what good men look like.
He became best known to most Australians via his appearances on the marketing tv show, Gruen.